Do you remember when gays wanted equal rights so they could do things like being able to visit their loved one in the hospital just like a married person? This made a lot of sense. Many States were willing to pass laws that would give them all the rights of a married couple but they would call it domestic partnership and similar names. The idea would have spread until all States would have eventually had that kind of law. Eventually they could have changed the name to "marriage". Did it happen? No! Gays wanted all or nothing. So because of their unwillingness to compromise on one word they got nothing except in one State.
